Many people are quick to label wealthy and influential individuals as stingy or selfish simply because they refuse to offer help when asked. But the real issue may not be their unwillingness to give it may be our failure to approach them wisely.
The truth is, even the richest individuals face challenges. From Aliko Dangote to Elon Musk, every successful person is navigating personal and professional struggles some of which are surprisingly ordinary. While they may have the resources to solve your problems, they too are in need of support, solutions, and sincerity.
This is where the Law of Reciprocity comes into play.
This principle is both timeless and powerful. when you give something of value be it help, recognition, or respect, others naturally feel compelled to return the favor. It’s not flattery or manipulation; it’s a basic human response.
One of the biggest mistakes people make is approaching successful individuals with nothing to offer, yet expecting everything in return. This often leads to disappointment. You’re seen not as a potential partner, but as a burden. That’s when you start hearing things like, “I’ll get back to you,” or “There’s nothing on ground at the moment.”
To change this narrative, you must first understand the person you’re reaching out to. Learn about their goals and challenges. Identify what matters to them. What are they struggling with health issues? Security concerns? Tax or legal burdens? Information gaps?
If you can provide a solution or even just lend thoughtful support you’ll stand out. But value doesn’t always mean solving big problems. Sometimes, simple gestures go a long way. Celebrate their achievements. Send kind messages. Nominate them for awards. Publicly acknowledge their efforts. Even a small token of appreciation, like airtime or data, can make an impression.
These acts help you shift from being seen as a liability to becoming an asset. You’ll earn trust, build a relationship, and most importantly, create space for reciprocity. In time, they may be the ones asking how they can support you.
Let’s be honest; it’s rare to get something for nothing. Even scripture affirms this principle-“Give, and it shall be given unto you.” Before criticizing anyone for not helping, ask yourself what value have I added to their life.
The Law of Reciprocity works. Learn to use it with intention, and you’ll open doors that mere pleading never could.
Onono Writes from Bayero University Kano and can be reached via onimisionono54@gmail.com
