The Folktale of Tiv men offering their wives to strangers started with Umoru.
Umoru was a magician and a trader who came from the North, he had a gossip bird who goes before him during journeys, to see whether the area was less dangerous.
It was during the time of Gbango yams. The primary occupation of the Tiv People is farming and their strengths are a mystery.
Gbango yams gained lot of popularity and there became influx of traders to Zaks-Biam which was the then headquarter of production in Tiv Land to buy and transport the yams.
Tiv people are known for their kindness to guests, it was legendary as the average Tiv family regards their guests as gods and in some cases protect them with their lives.
According to the Tiv cultural beliefs, a wife is expected to serve and treat guests with utmost respect.
The Gbango yam gained a lot of popularity and big traders and merchants like Umoru, Okafor and Sako frequent their visits.
Umoru was received by Terkaa, the man regarded as the “King of Yams” in Zaki-Biam. Terkaa had five wives and 11children….the fifth wife, Torkwase,was newly married and had no child.
Umoru was to spend the night in Terkaa’s home, which in the morning, he would go and buy yams in the Market Square.
A Tiv Man builds houses for each of his wives, Round Huts or Thatch Houses. Umoru was given pounded yam and smoked fish that night, and stayed
outside with his bird.
At 11pm that night, Terkaa instructed Torkwase
to make the wooden bed for Umoru to sleep……as Strangers were allowed to sleep in the beds, while the home owner will either sleep outside the room or on the floor of the room.
The males in Tiv Land, everynight, worship the “gods of yams”, they would leave by 12am and spend two
hours making sacrifices and incantations to the “gods”….it is said that their strengths were gotten from these “gods”
Terkaa told Umoru to sleep in Torkwase’s Round hut(house), as she will prepare the bed for him….because Torkwase had space as she’s got no child.
When Terkaa and his children left to adore and worship the “gods of yams”, Umoru went to Torkwase’s room and slept with her.
Umoru thought Terkaa offered his wife to him or Maybe Umoru used charms and trickery to sleep with Torkwase.
For weeks, during his visits to Zaki-Ziam, Umoru would have sex with Torkwase. Torkwase never told her husband what was happening, as she never got
attention from her husband(she lacked sex) and may have enjoyed having sex with Umoru, because Umoru may have used “Burantashi” during sex
with her.
Umoru told Sako and Okafor, the other traders, about his “free gift” from Terkaa and told them to try their luck……Sako and Okafor were successful, undermining the Tiv Man’s Kindness.
Umoru went to the North, and told themthe news of the Tiv Man’s “kind gesture”…with Sako and Okafor doing the same.
Unknown to the Tiv People, lots of traders flock to their lands to do business in order to experience the “kind gesture”…..unfortunately, they were successful, as the Tiv Man married as many wives as
possible, but failed to meet their sexual demands.
The Tiv Men had no idea of what was happening in their Lands. On one of his numerous journeys to
identify groups of people who spoke the Tiv Language, the King of the Tivs(Tor Tiv), stumbled on this development.
The Tiv People are believed to have migrated from Congo to Nigeria, and they are scattered within the
North of Nigeria, from Benue to Plateau to Adamawa to Taraba State.
So the Tor Tiv’s assignment was to identify them and incorporate them under one “Umbrella”. It was on this journey to one of the Local Governments in Plateau State, that the Tor Tiv learnt that traders coming into his lands, were sleeping with his women.
The King came home and summoned a meeting. Wives were called and they confessed sleeping with those traders. The Men were furious and after much
deliberations, resolutions were reached.
No man should sit close or touch another man’s wife without permission, and the husband is allowed to kill the defaulter. They feel killing the traders who
perpetrated those shameful acts, will send strong warnings to visitors who wish to come to their lands……a decision that would turn out to haunt them.
Umoru’s “gossip bird” had already told him the plan on ground and he never went to the Tiv Land again. His friends, Sako and Okafor weren’t lucky……as they were killed.
Terkaa was once again in the picture, as he would gradually evolve a term known as the “Mad Farmer”. Terkaa used this opportunity to kill his enemies, claiming they harrassed or touched his wives.
Terkaa went about killing people and claiming their Lands. Land is one of the most valued assets of the Tiv People.
Terkaa killed Terkimbi, a Medicine graduate that was sponsored by the Villagers to read Medicine in America.
Torkwase got pregnant and was having
problems delivering her baby….so Terkimbi who just returned from overseas, was called upon.
Terkaa came back from the farms, saw Terkimbi assisting his wife in Labour, didn’t ask any question and struck Terkimbi with his cutlass. Terkimbi fell
down and died.
The “gods” were angry and hardship was unleashed to the people. Crops failed to grow, animals were dying.
A region that pride itself as the food basket of the Nation, was importing foods from neighbouring states.
A Lake in Cameroon was blamed for emitting poisonous gases that killed the crops and animals…..whereas, the “gods” were angry over the death of Terkimbi, and decided to punish them. The “gods” held back the rains.
Conditions got worse, people started dying from Malnutrition and diseases. The Tor Tiv sought the advice of the Priest of the Land and was told to go
home and perfom some rites.
The “gods” had demanded that Terkaa and his family be used for sacrifice. The villagers did as the Priest advised, and Terkaa and his family were
killed….and all his property was burnt.
Also the Tor Tiv found out that many wives were not receiving adequate attention from their husbands, so he gave a directive that if any man can’t
satisfy all his wives…that man should
marry fewer wives.
Also the the Tor Tiv ordered every Tiv Man to build extra houses for visitors…..and that killing any man that didn’t sleep with your wife is a serious crime, and the culprit will be banish.
Immediately the Villagers agreed to these terms, heavy rains fell that day. Everything came to normal, crops and animals sprung to life. The Tiv Man’s
pride was restored.
The divine kindness shown by the Tiv People to strangers was threatened, however, a Tiv Man still worship a stranger till today.
That’s why most Tiv Men married one wife, they could satisfy sexually. And that’s why most Tiv homes have extra rooms for stranger/visitors.
A Tiv Man loves his wife to the blood, and I wonder why the fallacy that stipulates that a Tiv Man offer his wife to strangers to have sex, was allowed to move from generations to generations.
Umoru is said to have resided in one of the Northern States, a blind man who rears goats. Please, if anybody has psyched or deceived you that a Tiv Man will give you his wife to have sex with…..
Don’t ever come to Benue State, because there is a “Mad Farmer” in every Tiv man and may cost you your life.
In addition, Within the Tiv culture, a widow can marry her late husband’s brother.
All the children, the widow delivered after the husband had died would still be considered the children of the late husband.”
The essence of this was to continue the family line of the deceased brother. However, a widow who did not wish to marry her late husband’s brother or son (from another wife) would be allowed to return to her parents and remarry whoever she desired.
To fully appreciate the Tiv concept of marriage, one must first understand the way they conceptualize the family. The Tiv word for the family is “tsombor.”
According to Wegh, ““Tsombur” is also the word for the umbilical cord, which joins mother and child before birth.
To the Tivs, marriage is beyond sexual or economic transaction, It is about creating an endless” line of relations and offspring tracing their descent to a common ancestor.
In conclusion, No one knows for sure the validity of this story but it is the only logical explanation for the widespread misconception because Tiv men do not offer their wives to guests and will never.
The average Tiv man is possessive and will never share or jeopardize his pride or family for anything. Be warned. Thank you 🤝
®️UNTAME!
